EP 115: Unburnable Ambition — An Immigrant Leader’s Perspective on Burnout, Tech & Sustainable Success

What does ambition look like when you’re navigating identity, immigration, and leadership — all at once?

In this episode of Thriving in Intersectionality, Dr. Lola Adeyemo sits down with award-winning author, tech leader, and podcast host Sheekha Singh to explore immigrant ambition, women in tech, burnout, and redefining success beyond hustle culture.

Born and raised in India, educated in the United States, and now based in Canada, Sheekha brings a global immigrant lens to leadership and high performance.

She is the author of:

• Unburnable Ambition — a practical, reflective guide for overachievers who want to win without burning out.

• The IT Girl — winner of the 2021 Dan Poynter Global Ebook Award (Gold) in Technology/Engineering.

In this conversation, we explore:

• The immigrant perspective on burnout
• Cultural expectations and pressure to succeed
• Women in tech and representation gaps
• H1B transitions and cross-border leadership journeys
• Why overcompensating leads to exhaustion
• How to advocate for yourself without playing the victim
• Boundaries as a leadership skill

Sheekha’s core belief:
Ambition doesn’t have to cost you your peace.

If you are an immigrant professional, a first-generation leader, a woman in tech, or someone navigating layered identities in the workplace, this episode will resonate.

🔗 Connect with Shika Singh

Podcast: Rise and Tell with Shika
Books: The IT Girl and Unburnable Ambition
Website: shikasingh.com

🔗 Connect with Host Dr. Lola Adeyemo

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drlolaadeyemo/
Website: Www.Drlola-Adeyemo.com

Belonging isn’t just a bonus — it’s a catalyst for sustainable growth.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:02

Hello and welcome to the Thriving in Intersectionality Podcast. A podcast that explores the real experiences of professionals navigating the workplace with layered belief identities. I'm your host, Dr. Lola Ateemo, the CEO of EQI Mindset and founder of the nonprofit Immigrants Incorporate Inc. I'm also an author, speaker, and a workplace inclusion strategist. I work with organizations to build communities of belonging through strategy, storytelling, and systems change. This podcast amplifies the voices of professionals from intersectional backgrounds, immigrants, ethnic minorities, first-gen professionals, veterans, working parents, individuals with disabilities, and so many more. Through solo reflections and guest conversations, we'll uncover the eating challenges, celebrate the wins, and offer insights to help you thrive, not just survive in the corporate world. Because in today's global workforce, belonging isn't just a bonus, it's the catalyst for real growth and impact. Let's dive in. Alright, welcome back to another episode of the Thriving in Intersectionality Podcast. I am excited to bring my guests up today. But as always, before I dive into the chat and have Shika uh join this conversation, I like to set the context. And so I will do a little bit of context setting about the word intersectionality. What is intersectionality? The name of the podcast is Striving in Intersectionality. And if this is your first episode and you are not familiar with the word, I hope to shed some light on that for you. Intersectionality is a framework that recognizes how multiple aspects of identity, such as gender, race, ethnicity, immigration status, even and class, among so many others, how all of these identity categories intersect and overlap with each other, creating very unique experiences of privilege or discrimination that you can't understand by examining a single one just by itself. And of course, uh the the identity categories we are talking about could also be a lot of underserved, minoritized categories. So not just any category. I think that's where the differentiator really needs to be clear because a lot of times people can use it in the context of, oh, we have different experiences, we have different, yeah, we can use it in all of that. But I came into this work through the work of Kimberly Crenshaw, and she did a study around the experiences of people of Black women. So looking at that intersection of race and gender. Now, a lot of different researchers have explored intersection through different identity overlap. And so hopefully that helps to give you some context about the reason why my guests are here and the questions are set up in a way that we get to know these leaders uh personally through their journey and how their journey and their identities have shaped the work that they currently do. So thank you for joining us today, Shika. How are you doing? Good. Thank you for having me on your show, Lola. It's great. All right. Um, I'm gonna introduce uh Shika briefly. Shika Singh has 12 years of experience as a QA quality assurance leader, certified product owner, and public speaker. She blends real world leadership insights with personal storytelling to help high-achieving professionals escape also culture, protect their energy, and build lives that feel as good as the in on the inside as the look on paper. We all need that. When she's not writing or recording, she also has a podcast, and and we'll be talking about that uh briefly. And um, you find her traveling, exploring local craft breweries or chasing sunsets with her husband and their dog Onyx. Her work focuses on one call belief. Ambition doesn't have to cost you your peace. Great to meet you, Shika. Thanks so much for joining me. Thank you for that wonderful introduction, Lola. It's great to meet you and dive right in because um I love when I have guests that I didn't get a chance to get to know because then I'm coming here very curious myself, and so get ready for me to ask questions. Yeah, so um I just read the definition of intersectionality to help the people listening, and then I talked about your bio so that we can get out of the way because we'll end up with your career. But I would love for you to think about your own journey, your own life, and introduce yourself. We have people listening and people watching this. And when you think of intersectionality, what aspects of your own identity have been most relevant in shaping your leadership journey? So take us behind the scenes of who Shika Singh is.

SPEAKER_02 5:22

Wow, what a great question, Lola. And I'm so excited. And you just hit the right spot with this question because I just published my second book, Unburnable Ambition, um, in January of 2026. And congratulations.

SPEAKER_00 5:36

Oh, wow, that's very brand new. Congratulations.

SPEAKER_02 5:39

Thank you, thank you. And one of the main important reasons why I wrote that book was I wanted to add the immigrant perspective on burnout. A lot of people talk about burnout, but they don't know what it feels to pack your bag up in two suitcases, move countries when you're super young, start everything from scratch. Yes, that sounds okay, but not many people realize the expectations that you have on your shoulder from people back home when you grew up or when you were growing up. So if I were to answer your question, how did my identity change my life? I think it is, it reflects in everything that I do. I grew up in India and moved to the US in 2014 for my master's degree. Got my master's degree in 2016, worked in Omaha for six years, Omaha, Nebraska. And then I wanted to write a book. I wanted to really do something. And I was on the H1B visa at that time. Uh, you're not supposed to have any other income besides your nine to five job. And I'm like, okay, I really need to write a book. I need to show people something. And it I actually wanted to solve a gap. And one of my the first book that I wrote, it's behind there, it's called The IT Girl. And that was again based on what I noticed and my background. That book is all about why we need more women in tech, and that it is not as complicated. And I have a list of like 30 plus jobs that I added there. But the whole reason why I wrote that book was when I started working in Omaha, I looked around and most of the engineering teams did not have women in them. The ratio was very bad. But back home when I was growing up in my engineering class, there were a lot of women, like a lot of girls and guys. The ratio, again, it wasn't half to half, but it's still, we still had girls in engineering classes. But when I came here, I'm like, what's wrong? Why is it that we don't have a lot of female engineers? So that again, my first book, like you said, my identity, everything that I experienced back home and the difference that I saw, that shaped my first book. And then the second book was also the same. I got into another job and then moved to Canada. Again, a big culture shock from US to Canada. Moved here in 2020, and it'll be six years this summer that we've moved to Canada. I have had a variety of experiences meeting different people and trying to learn their stories, trying to get the most that I can, and also trying to implement some of those tips, those suggestions, trying to learn about the different culture. People in Canada are very different. They're very friendly, super cool, super chill. Like you can go to a bar, you'll make five friends, and you'll be back. So I wanted to incorporate all of that. And then I realized that even though you have the perfect life on paper, sometimes that ambition that you have, you might the goals that you set for yourself, you might drive yourself to burnout. And that's why I wrote the second book. But I wrote it with an immigrant point of view, because when we move countries, and we can get into this in detail later on, but to answer your initial question, Lola, everything that I am in my 33 years of existence has definitely influenced everything that I put out on the internet through either my books or through my podcast.

SPEAKER_00 9:28

Right, right. We are shaped by everything, and I think that's um I am an immigrant myself. I I was born and raised in Nigeria, and I think we come into corporate America. I came into corporate America normalizing what we saw, which was people putting their lives into compartments.

SPEAKER_02 9:48

Yes, right.

SPEAKER_00 9:50

It's like this is what you do at work, this is what you don't do at work. Um, somebody recently put a post about nails, and I remember because scientists by background, I remember thinking um uh being told it was inappropriate to have bright colored nails.

SPEAKER_02 10:07

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 10:08

You know, now I'm thinking about it. I'm like, how do we hear things like that and do we listen and believe it, right? Correct, correct. Because that's what everybody else does, right? You know, you don't wear bright colored nails or bright color clothes. This is what you do at work, everything else is unprofessional. So um, thank you so much for sharing that. And and congratulations on your books. And for those listening, we'll definitely be dropping the links um to those books in the uh show notes. Um, so your immigrant identity, travel, cross-country, global experience, I would say is a huge part of uh identity categories for you. Is there anything else you want to add?

SPEAKER_02 10:49

I would say upbringing. The way so my mother was a single mom. My father passed away when I was very young. So I grew up with my grandma and my mom, and my mom would always work. So after I reached a certain age when I would hang out with my friends, and you know, certain topics came up, um, I would feel so weird because I'm like, what? You guys don't do this? And they're like, What? You're a girl and you do this? I'm like, yeah, who else would do certain things? Because we don't have a man in the house, so it's us doing all of those things. So I would say even things like that shaped um sort of how I talk to people, the kind of relationships that I made after moving abroad, and then everything that I do, the the level of judgment has changed drastically in the last 10 years, I would say. And that would also be one of the things that influenced um what I do currently.

SPEAKER_00 11:50

Wow. I mean, yes, I I think what you said is also the gendered role, right? Yes, yes. So people assume they know your gendered role because of whatever they think they know about growing up in India, but you don't really know until you talk to somebody what their upbringing was like. Uh, but we are all a product of how we were raised. Thank you for sharing that. Of course. All right, let's walk through your career, career path because you kind of talked about engineering tech a little bit. Um, so before we get to what you are doing currently, how did you get here? What were those career choices like for you? Why did you choose what you choose, and um how did you navigate up till now?

SPEAKER_02 12:34

I can talk about this for an hour because that's exactly what half of my first book is. I I'm gonna be very honest, Lola. So when I was growing up, and things have changed now in India, but when I was growing up, I only got two options either become a doctor or an engineer. I still remember I went to my mom and I said I want to be a DJ. And she's like, Are you mad? That's not happening. And then I'm like, Okay, fine, you know, I'm a teenager, I want to do something different, not that everyone else around me is doing. And then one day I came up to her. I had actually won an award at school for elocution, and I came back and I said, You know what, mom? I think I want to be a journalist. And she goes, Do you know how much they earn? You will not be able to survive with the journalist's salary. I'm like, No way, but I like it. I'm I'm so happy about it. I like to talk, I like to do this. And she's like, No ways. Then I said, Okay, you know what? If I have a choice, then I'm definitely gonna go um the medicine route because I want to become a doctor. And then she came back one day and she said, I'm so sorry, but I don't think I can afford your medical school fees, so that's out. I'm like, okay, all right. So then engineering was the only choice. Um even then, I think I wanted to get into aeronautical engineering, but my mom made me talk to one of her co-workers and then one of our relatives, and they told me, you know what, a bachelor's degree is just going to be an introduction to all the um different areas that you have later on. You can decide which expertise you want to go under and which one, which direction you want to choose. So try it, it's fun. I'm like, fine, whatever. And then I remember that was one night before we had to submit the confirmation for our universities. That's when I had selected computer science engineering. I had no idea, no clue at all what I was getting into. But I did that, and then finally, four years just went by, and not many people know this, but I actually was at the top of my class for all four years. After that, everyone, like I said, I did not have that much exposure like kids these days do. So most of the people in my class were writing their GRE, prepping for GRE in their second or third year, because that's what you have to do if you want to move to the US for your master's degree. I didn't know that again, went mom. I'm like, you know what? Everyone's going to the US. I think I should go too. And she's like, I don't think we can afford that. So I just didn't do anything. I was just going at the flow, got into a lot of different activities while I was at college, um, started a lot of clubs and a lot of different things. And then finally, one day, my mom got a new job and we had a little more money, and she's like, Okay, you know what? Why don't you start prepping for the GRE and then we'll see how it goes, we'll apply for a loan or whatever. Everything worked out finally. Um, got my GRE done, applied for universities and University of Nebraska at Omaha. They were they gave me a scholarship. So I was like, fine, there's no questioning this. This is the university that I'm gonna go to. And that's when I put my foot down and I said, okay, I'm not gonna go into the detailed complicated computer engineering subjects. I want to do what I like, and then I chose management information systems. Okay, that was a very lovely learning curve. First of all, it was culture shock because you're moving from India to the US. But in India, yeah, and in India, you're like spoon-fed your entire life. There, there's maids, there are servants, so you don't learn to do anything yourself. Um, same thing with food. My grandma used to cook food all the time, so I did not even know how to cook. I still remember the first time I had roommates, never lived with roommates, just had a younger sister. I still remember there was a time when all of my roommates were sitting and it was my turn to cook, and I burnt everything. And now I'm trying to YouTube and Google.

SPEAKER_01 16:54

I got I got the nice Indian, all my roommates in grad school were Indians and they love to cook, so I guess I got the Indians, then you're at yeah, so it was very different, and then finally, uh, those two years were very hard though, but I think that also shaped me.

SPEAKER_02 17:16

Um, and that was a growing point because nine to five, or like yeah, nine to five would be um internship, and then five to eight p.m. would be the classes, and then eight p.m. you're back home, you're trying to cook, you're trying to clean, but then also you have to do your assignments. So it was a whole another thing. Oh, yeah. And then that's when I learned different kinds of people, different choices, different opinions. Like, not everybody is your friend, and you need to learn how to establish your boundaries. You can't let your people walk over you. So a lot of different experiences shaped, and then finally, after two years, got a job. Um, I had the internship, but then I got a full-time job, and that's when I went into QA. Right now, I am a QA leader, been a QA leader for a long time. I'm also a Scrum master and uh certified product owner. So those were the things that kind of shaped everything that I did. Was in the US, things looked great, but then like I said, I wanted to all my friends around me were like, You have H1B for three more years. Why are you leaving that and going to Canada? I'm like, No, I want to do something for myself. Yes, money is one thing, but then after a certain point in time, you're sitting and you're thinking, paying bills is not the only thing that I'm going to do in my life. I want to do something more. So I decided, and because I knew I couldn't wait um to get my green card in the US, it would take like 20 or 25 more years. I'm like, no, this cannot be it. So applied for Canadian residency. I'm a Canadian citizen now, moved to Canada, published a first book in 2021, second one now, and then I have my podcast. Um, again, one of those moments two years ago where I'm like, okay, I wrote a first book, I'm doing good at the job's great, everything's okay, settled in a lovely country. What what's next? And that's when I thought I wanted to there was there were a lot of things that I wanted to share to other people and share with other people and help them grow because I'm someone who loves self-improvement and self-growth stuff. And I thought, you know, there's a gap because all the podcasts that we hear are all about someone great who've been doing, you know, they've been doing stuff for a long time. They either had some background, they had money or they had fame or something. But nobody talks about the small little fights that we fight every single day as common people. Nobody speaks about those people like us who have a nine to five job but are also doing something else. And I wanted to talk to people who've gone from nothing to something. So I'm like, okay, this is it. That's I'm this is what I'm going to talk about. This is what I'm going to focus on, and this is what my guests are going to do. So I started gathering a lot of people, got some good feedback, and yeah, it's been two years now, and I've had over 56-ish episodes, and now we upload every week. So things are good. What is your podcast called? It's called Rise and Tell with Shika.

SPEAKER_00 20:33

Rise and tell with Shika. All right. Uh, definitely looking forward to sharing that and listening to it as well. Thank you. And and thank you for everything you shared because um I think there definitely is a need based on what you described, right? It's um also similar to why I started this podcast because it's a leadership podcast, it's an inclusive workplace podcast, where I'm really very selective of the people that I bring. It's not the same people that we hear on all the podcasts, it's people with a story to share. Yeah, it's it's um, and I tell people, you know, I've had guests that have worked at big companies, and sometimes they're like, Oh, I don't want to say where I work, and I'm like, that sounds great to me. It's not about where you work, yeah, it's about you. I want to learn your story. Where you work can change tomorrow. Yes, um, but your story is your story, and and we need to be comfortable sharing that because for people listening, and maybe that's where the final part of the the episode, which uh I will put that question back to you, even though you've kind of already shared a lot of what you have been learning along the way. So, the final part of the question that I want to move to is more on your insights and wisdom as you've uh navigated this world of work. So, as people as you shared about your intersectionality, being an immigrant, a woman, being raised by a single mom in India, right? All of those things, if there's something That is listening that can relate with you, right? Maybe even an international student or somebody that came into the country on a H1B visa or F1 visa, right? If people are listening to you now and they are also navigating their work, the workplace, what are some of the advice that you have learned from your own journey to share with them? And also, I I think I always used to focus that question on from your own journey, but also from your own leadership. So two sides of it, right? You can learn from your journey, but also from the work and uh, you know, having written a book, having hosted multiple conversations, there's a different set of learning and a different set of view that you have. Um, because the world of work is changing so fast in this 2026. Things are not necessarily what they were five years ago, even three years ago, right? Um, so as you unpack that, what are some of the things that that made it work for you that you would advise for people that can relate with you that also want to build successful careers?

SPEAKER_02 23:03

Yeah. First thing that I would say is us as people, as humans, we are scared of something that doesn't look or sound like us, no matter what it is. And so at in the beginning, if someone's trying to be, you know, different towards you, it's not because they have something against you, it's just that they don't know who you are. So if you are an immigrant or if you've moved recently, you haven't worked in a corporate setup, or you haven't worked with people wet on, I mean, Americans or Canadians or whoever it is, then I would say make an effort to know them and make an effort to ensure that they know who you are and what you bring to the table. Yes, it is very unfortunate that even today in 2026, you might have to verify, validate, and you know, you might need a lot more effort to show people that yes, you're capable of doing things, you're capable, way more capable, maybe when compared to the person sitting next to you. Yes, that's how it is. It it will change in the future, right? But don't lose hope. Don't lose hope because there are amazing leaders out there who will listen to you and who will support you. But also at the same time, what I have learned as a leader for so many years working for American companies is that don't take anything for granted and don't be entitled. Like you cannot go and say, just because I'm a woman, I've been in the company for 10 years, give me a raise, or I deserve a raise. Instead, what you do is you need to upgrade your skills and prove to them that in the last 10 years, you have been, you are not the same that you were when they hired you 10 years ago. And you need to bring a different set of data to your management to show them why you deserve a race, but never play the victim card. That just puts you down, and that's just how it is. So the sooner you learn to play the game, the happier you're going to be. And if you are someone who's trying to climb the corporate ladder, or if you're someone who has a very different cultural background, and you know, you might be at a point where I don't think anybody can relate to me. I don't think anybody, you know, I don't think they eat the same food that I do. I don't think they do the same things that I do. Take that out of your head because everybody wakes up in the morning and then goes to bed at night. So there has to be something common with you and your co-workers. Find out what that is. And even if you can't find out, I would say make an effort to find out what that is and build the relationships. Unless and until you've built a good network, then there is nothing that's going to help you. If you if you think you are single-handedly going to climb the corporate ladder, that's not happening. You need a team, you need someone who takes out your name in rooms where you're not available, and that's what's going to make you move forward. Your work should speak for itself. And I can give an example here because I have met people who just want to prove that they can do way more. And in doing that, they burn themselves out. So don't even go that extreme where you're like overcompensating, you're overdoing, you're overworking, extra hours, etc. Don't do that. Just find the right balance and then try to make a network. Even when I published my first book when I was in Omaha, the most supporters that I had at that time were my coworkers. I got insights from them. I'm still in touch with people who I worked with like eight years ago, nine years ago. And even now, I work for a 100% remote company. I have some amazing coworkers. One's in Japan, once um most of them are in the US, but they're all over the world. And the minute I spoke about my book, everybody were like, oh wow, this is great. We've already read it, and you know, suggestions. And I would say feedback. If someone's giving you a feedback, be it your manager, be it your coworker, be it anybody, learn to trust them. Because yes, there there is office gossip and there's going to be politics, there's going to be all of that. But you get to decide where you're drawing the boundary. And when you take that feedback, make sure it you're actually implementing it and not getting offended by it. Because all that most of the time, if you're in a corporate setup, no one's just going to walk to you and say, hey, you know what? I think you need to do this better, or you need to do this in a different way. If you're asking for feedback, then make sure you're actually implementing it because that's how you grow. And the most important thing that I learned in my corporate career, in my career as a leader, is accepting that you don't know something and also learning to say no. Because when you learn to say no, you just uh you grow in a different way. Because and you don't have to be rude about it. You can draw a line very clearly, very politely, and in a kind way that protects your energy. And you can say, you know, you know what? Um, I'm already busy or I am, I have a lot on my plate right now with X, Y, and Z project. Yes, I can look into what you want me to, but it's not going to be until tomorrow or until next week. So draw boundaries. You can't just be rude about it and say, no, I'm not gonna do it, or I don't want to do it. So all these points, keep it in mind, and all of these take time. So practice it, and you will one day have a wonderful network of friends, co-workers who become amazing friends, and um, sometime when you decide to do something else other than your corporate job, then you're going to already have a list of supporters ready to support and cheer you on.

SPEAKER_00 29:17

Absolutely. I love it. Yeah, um, I I think the reality is when you you're always going to have co-workers who don't agree with you, who are not like you. We all have that scenario every time. And um I I think it's it takes leadership, it takes skills to learn to navigate workplace conflicts and personalities because ultimately we are all trying to achieve the same goal. We're trying to get a project done and we need to work together. You don't get to just walk away and say, I don't like this person, and so I don't want to work with them. Guess what? You have to deliver together. So um, all of that that you share, yeah, we could talk about that all day, about navigating office politics, but really thriving in intersectionality is about understanding the things you need to do um in order to advance and lead, uh, especially in the workplace. So, thank you so much, Chica, for sharing your experience. Thank you for your insights. Um, I will I'm looking forward to sharing some of your conversations as well on your podcast, um, as well as your book. And uh before we close, I have a final question that I love to wrap with after all the serious talks we we've been having. But is there anything else you want to add before I move on to my final question to close us out? Anything else you want to add?

SPEAKER_02 30:40

Yeah, I would just say go check out my books, they're all on Amazon, and then my podcast, Rise and Tell with Shika. And if you need more information, you can find it on my website, shika Singh.com.

SPEAKER_00 30:51

Thank you so much, Shika. All right, if you were to share a dish with a co-worker, a dish could be a fruit, a snack, you know. If you were to share a meal, eat something with your co-workers. Um what would what would you pick? And why did you pick what you pick? Chicken biryani. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_01 31:14

Why did you pick that? Because you said that so fast. I was like, oh, there's gotta be a reason.

SPEAKER_02 31:19

Yeah, so this, yeah, this the city that I grew up in, or the city that I was born in India is Hyderabad, and it is supposed to have not supposed, I know it for a fact, but it's known for its biryani. Oh, and so I grew up eating biryani, and that's what grandmother's grandmother's biryani or yours. Grandma's, and my you know what my grandma was so shocked when I told her that I made biryani, and she's like, Are you sure that's biryani or is it something else? I'm like, Yes, yes. So, yeah, I that's one thing that I would share. It holds a lot of I associate that with good times, and so I would definitely that would be the my call.

SPEAKER_00 32:02

Great great memory. Oh, thank you so much. Now you're making me hungry. I do love Indian food. Um I didn't have it. So yeah, I didn't have it until I came to the US. But again, I I came in as a student as well, and my roommates were Indians, and uh, I loved when they would make food and and and share, and they got me really exposed to Indian uh cuisine, and I think there is a similar level of intensity with our spices in Nigeria, so it's not the same, but it's it's comparable, at least better than US. Thank you so much. It was nice meeting you. It was nice getting to hear your story and capture your insights and experiences, and congratulations again on your latest book. And uh looking forward to the next ones.

SPEAKER_02 32:53

Definitely, thank you, Lola. It's been a pleasure to be here on your show.

SPEAKER_00 32:57

It's been a pleasure to be here. Thank you. Thank you for being part of today's conversation on thriving in intersectionality. If you're an HR or DEI leader and you need employee resource group or business resource group resources, let's connect and LinkedIn and help organizations build inclusive cultures through inclusive workplace communities, strategy, and storytelling. Immigrants and first-gen professionals, join our free community at www.immigrantsincorporate.org for career support, networking, and resources in community with peers who understand your journey. Tag our podcast page on LinkedIn or connect with me directly to continue the conversation. Please don't forget to rate and review to help others discover these discussions. Keep thriving in your intersections. Your story matters. I'm Dr. Lola Adeyo, and this has been Thriving in Intersectionality Podcast.